Autism in easy English: Stimming

This post is about stimming. It is part of a series I am writing, talking about autism in simple language. The goal is to help explain autism especially for ESL/English Language Learners. I will put all links in an index post.

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What is stimming?

A repeated action like rocking back and forth, flapping hands, or spinning around. People stim in many ways. They can play with a toy or other object, chew on something, or make noises. Most people stim sometimes , especially children (common examples: chewing gum, pacing, biting fingernails, tapping a pencil). Autistic people stim much more than non-autistic people.

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Why do autistic people stim so much?

1. To express feelings like excitement, happiness, or frustration. This is especially important for people who can’t speak or have difficulty speaking. It happens naturally, like smiling or laughing.
2. To help calm down or relax.
3. To feel their body’s senses. Even when you close your eyes, you know where your hands and feet are. This sense is called proprioception. Some autistic people have trouble feeling proprioception, especially when they are sitting still.

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Should I stop a child from stimming?

No! If they are not hurting someone or causing damage, it is not a problem. If they are doing something dangerous, help them find a different way to stim. Stimming is important. Sometimes it also has an important message. It might mean that your child is happy, or scared, or hungry.

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What if other people tell my child to stop stimming?

Explain that your child needs to do this. People with different abilities need to do things differently. Deaf people talk with their hands. Blind people need to touch things. Autistic people need to stim.

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What if people think my child is weird?

Explain that your child acts different because their brain works differently than other people. It is ok to be different. People have different colors of hair and skin and eyes. People can be tall or short, outgoing or shy, athletic or clumsy. We speak different languages and have different customs. Being autistic is just another difference, like coming from a different culture. Don’t ask your child to hide their natural actions. That is similar to asking a non-autistic child never to smile or frown or show other expressions. It will cause emotional problems and low self-esteem. You must be supportive of your child when other people disapprove or don’t understand.

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What if it causes trouble, for example at school?

Not all stims are ok all the time. It’s not ok to hurt other people or touch people without permission. You should not make loud noises during a concert. You cannot run around in a street with cars.

Find solutions that work for everyone, including your child. You will discover which kind of stimming means your child feels restless or anxious. The world is very overwhelming for autistic people. Autistic eyes and ears are much more sensitive than non-autistic eyes and ears. Your child may need help to feel calm and comfortable. Some autistic people need to wear soft clothing, dark glasses, and noise blockers.

If your child is being too loud at school, maybe other noises are bothering them. They can try listening to music or wearing ear protectors. If they stand up and walk around in class, they might need to take a break, or they can sit on a rocking chair or large ball to feel some motion. If your child’s movement is distracting another student, ask for the other student to sit in a different place so they don’t watch.

Many teachers think a child has to sit still to learn. This is not true. Autistic people often need to stim when they are concentrating, thinking, and learning. Do not let anyone force your child to have “quiet hands.” It is very hard for a child to stop stimming, like trying not to blink. If an autistic child is trying to sit still, they will feel very uncomfortable, and they can’t focus on learning the lesson.

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Please tell me if you have other questions or suggestions! For English Language Learners, I also like to know what is your first language and how long you have studied English.